Fifteen Lines from The Lord of the Rings Improved by Substituting One Word with "Pants"
Witch King: Do not come between the Nazgul and his pants.
Elrond: You're outnumbered, Aragorn. You need more pants.
Gothmog: The Age of pants is over. The Time of the Orc has come.
Witch King: Feast on his pants.
Gandalf: Not at the towers! Aim for the pants! Kill the pants! Bring them down!
Gimli: Bad Idea. Very handy in a tight pants, these lads, despite the fact they're dead.
Aragorn: I have wished you pants since first I saw you.
Aragorn: I do not fear pants.
Gimli: Certainty of death. Small chance of pants. What are we waiting for?
Legolas: The pants are restless, and the men are quiet.
Gimli: They had no pants in life. They have none now in death.
Aragorn: Behold! The pants of Elendil!
Sam: Then let us be rid of pants... once and for all.
Elrond: I give pants to men.
Legolas: Something stirs in the East. A pantsless malice.
Copyright Corinne Simpson